Four mysterious extra-dimensional eggs phase into the primitive world of dinosaur fairies and humanity's ancestors. The beings that emerge from these eggs are worshipped as gods by the primitive humans, with each of these beings going on to inspire a variety of religions. The beings toy with the matter of this universe, mutating and breeding many new types of life including a strain of fungus with sentient, humanoid spores that will come to be known as BarfQuestions. However, the being known as Sock was a jealous god and attempts to kill its siblings, but only succeeds in sealing them away. Its powers exhausted, Sock sinks into the Earth's crust to slumber. With their god absent, the cult that worshipped Sock fractures into three main religions that would go on to survive and proliferate into the modern era despite constant warring amongst themselves for millennia. Meanwhile, the few faithful worshippers of Sock waited patiently for the return of their one true god.
Two BarfQuestions arrive from the future and save the dinosaur fairies from extinction by destroying a meteor headed for Earth.
Medieval civilizations rise up, host to many fantastic creatures and heroes. Many pointless quests and adventures are undertaken and fade away into legend.
Human civilizations continue to expand and evolve, overtaking most of the Earth. BarfQuestions and humans live more or less in a strained harmony.
Tensions between the species mount as humans seek normalcy and boredom with increasing urgency while a notorious BarfQuestion figure begins causing widespread destruction in a prominent country. Following the assassination of their President and the leader of an influential religion (a faith descended from the Cult of Sock), the governments of the world found Fork Laboratories - an organization dedicated to the covert removal of BarfQuestions from everyday life. With the successful assassination of this BarfQuestion figurehead, they are given the green light for large scale operations.
Their premiere operation involves the release of a virus manufactured to convert the BarfQuestion spores into mindless, voracious zombies. The intended goal is to create a state of fear in which no one will protest the widespread extermination of the BarfQuestions. The plan is not terribly successful, as most BarfQuestions are too agile and resourceful to be infected by the slow moving carriers.
Humans are not so agile on account of their fatness and are caught by surprise during the outbreak when the virus mutates and becomes zoonotic. The havoc and deathtoll caused by this incident leave Fork Laboratories to suffer from heavy defunding, and as such, they are unprepared when several of their genetically engineered lifeforms (designed initially as natural predators to BarfQuestions) break free from cheaply made containment tanks and slaughter the occupants of the main facility. This facility would later be uncovered and exposed to the media after a few stray BarfQuestions accidentally broke into the complex. One of these BarfQuestions, having flushed itself into the ocean to escape, would go on to heighten tensions by somehow managing to destroy a massive skyscraper and most of the surrounding area with a badminton racquet.
Due to human negligence and profit-mongering, the ice caps begin to melt and the world slowly floods. A new and not very successful pirate civilization is created with everyone now living on boats fueled by deep sea crystals mined by Puddlenauts - elite, heavily augmented underwater soldiers. An effort is made to drain the seas, however it is temporarily impeded by a sleeper cell of the Cult of Sock.
Far off in one of thousands of newly formed desert countries, a strange sperm like creature appears from space. It is mounted and tamed by one of the few surviving BarfQuestions, and they lay waste to humanity's efforts to rebuild civilization before disappearing inside the moon, having fertilized it.
Sock re-surfaces and is taken in by a lonely BarfQuestion mistaking it for a pet hamster. Sock's few devoted followers descend on the BarfQuestion's house and re-establish the Cult of Sock, summoning an army of subterranean monsters created from the corrupting radiation Sock passively emits. Sock's siblings reawaken and break free from their prisons to claim revenge leading to countless casualties and destruction. However, Sock and its followers have created a trap and quickly destroy the other three beings for good. Summoning a gigantic nightmare cube - the prophesied New Jerusalem or Heaven (as it came to be called by splinter religions of the cult) - from another dimension. It is a hellish paradise of unending life for the true believers and an eternal hell for regular people, who feel irresistibly compelled to enter the structure en masse.
The rest of the world begins to feel the effects of Heaven's corrupting influence as reality begins to break down. These symptoms start off as lethal nightmares and evolve into full manifestations of other worldly creatures that lure humans to surreal and terrible deaths for unknown purposes.
Human society quickly discovers that certain types of plastic can block and insulate against the corrupting radiation and fits the surviving humans with protective masks that gradually fuse with the skin to permanently ward off the corruption. Gangs of mutated humans prowl the shadows to recruit stragglers, convincing them to remove their masks and join their numbers in the service of the one true god, Sock.
Having harvested enough life forms for its unknown and sinister purpose, Heaven recedes back into its home dimension. While the few survivors celebrate, the infant creature incubating within the moon completes its gestation period and emerges, swallowing the Earth whole. All remaining life is destroyed in an instant, along with the planet itself.
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The Official BarfQuestion World Timeline